The Church Invisible

Note.

This blog was written at the end of the week before I went on leave, so it predates the church porch fire by a fortnight and is out of sequence. I am posting it anyway because it indicates some of the frustration of the days before the fire, trying to cope with the familiar stream, day after day, of mischievous youths messing about in the church grounds and on the roof.
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If you are of the same generation as me, and of a similar background, you will have heard of the 'Church Militant here in Earth'. You probably know about the Saints and the 'cloud of witnesses', and even the 'Church Triumphant'. But you probably won't have heard of the Church Invisible. Yet that is what we have become. The Church of England has become The Church Invisible.

It has evidently been a creeping process, and the significance of the early signs was not specially obvious. Twenty odd years ago, when first we came to live in this parish, we asked the local police for directions. Their station is barely a mile from the church, but they had no idea at all where the church was, and directed us to a quite different place ! At the time that seemed a bit odd, but since the church stands at the very edge of its parish (a silly choice of site, if ever there was one) on what is effectively a long cul-de-sac where no one goes unless they actually live there, or have gotten lost, we decided it was hardly surprising. Fondly I hoped that we would soon change that state of affairs.

But despite the fact that the church through the intervening years has received a fair amount of local publicity, nothing has changed - the police still don't seem to know where we are. Call them, when you could use help to discourage the latest group of vandals from removing bits of the church and throwing them out into the road, and it soon becomes clear.

Typically, the conversations go thus: "What Church?" St. John's Church on Oakdale Road in Carlton. "Did you say Oakdale Road?" Yes, Oakdale Road in Carlton, Nottingham. " Is that Oakdale Road in Arnold ?" No. Oakdale Road in Carlton. Sometimes people call it Bakersfields. "So that's Oakdale Road.... Carlton...... And did you say St. John's Baptist Church?" No, its not a Baptist church, its the Church of England Parish Church called St. John THE Baptist.... "Oh. Right. And who are you?" I'm the Vicar.... "And do you live near the building?" Yes, I know it is not always the case these days, but as it happens I live right next door" "So what is you address?" Well, oddly enough its called the Vicarage, on Oakdale Road. Sometimes the databases call it no. 261.. "So, is there a post code?" Yes, its NG..... Look, I know there probably isn't anyone available, but it really would help if someone is free to come over here and do something to remove these kids... 'I'm sorry but we have to follow the procedure... Is there a phone number at the Vicarage where you can be contacted?" Yes, its 01159... "Now, you say you're having trouble with these youths, are they still there?" Yes. That's why I'm calling you... "And just what are they doing?" And so it labours on.

At first I was not surprised. Usually when you call the police, you get put through to a call centre, which could be in many different places. If you happen to be talking to someone in Mansfield, for example, its hardly surprising that they don't know too much about Nottingham. But the same sort of thing happens even when you have waded through the system and finally been connected with the local station! For nearly a quarter of a century, every Summer we have had the same problems, and I myself, or my wife, or the Church Wardens, have been phoning the local police about vandals... and still they have no record of any of our names or addresses, while some of them no longer know what a Vicar or vicarage is, and they don't know the location of the church building. Indeed, as I observed before, the church has not become more visible, it has simply become more invisible.